I've taken one post down and simply not posted a few others. I'll post this one definitely.
One of my life goals is to learn as many languages as I can. The list of languages includes (in no particular order and is not limited to) Japanese, French, Spanish, German, Latin, Greek, Hebrew, Chinese, Korean, Portuguese, and Loxian. I've taken 3 years of Spanish classes, 1 year of French with Rosetta Stone, and a bit of self-study with Japanese. For Japanese I use Textfugu now. I was putting my focus on that. Here's what's up now:
1. I'm going to continue learning Latin and Greek words with some Anki flashcards because I want to be a neurologist. I need a medical vocabulary to be instilled in me, but I don't know what I need, so I'm going to get exposure to words that I wouldn't for quite a while.
2. For all: listening to podcasts so that I get exposure. Understanding isn't important. I just need to get a better feel. I need patterns for speaking. I'm not a natural communicator. At least I don't think I'm very good at it, so I need to listen. I need to start working on my voice in each language as I'm attempting to learn it.
3. I'm going to return to Japanese while dabbling in French and German. Sounds crazy, but I need to connect things. Maybe I'll learn something in French that helps me with Japanese or I'll find out that I need to learn something in Japanese that I wouldn't have thought to pursue. The more I've read, the more I've come to realize that connecting concepts is important. Redescribing one thing in terms of something else is also helpful. Connection to connection to connection.
4. No matter how bogged down by studies I get, I will continue in some small way. I can't get lost in being "busy" or "taking a break". I have no excuse to not put just a few minutes a day. Stopping is not helpful. I will never be who I want to be without putting just a bit of time and effort into that person. I want to be smart, so I need to do smart things. I want to be a polyglot, so I need to do what a polyglot does.
I get into these moods sometimes. I just want to plan and list and hope and work for my goals. I make slow progress, but it's progress. I say it all the time, I know. I just know who I want to be and I want to be her so badly that I won't stop. I may sound silly when I make lofty plans, but I'm happy when I work at them. I love the feeling that I'm becoming someone. I know I'm already special. Blah blah blah. I want to be special to myself and do something to earn the compliments I've gotten. I know some of them have just been hopes. Sometimes I don't think some people mean to say that I am really smart or beautiful. They mean that they hope I'll use my potential and build upon myself. Maybe they don't mean anything. I don't care. It's nice to hear nice things. I'm going to continue working on my dreams no matter what.
I've become terrible at posting every week here. I do post on Tumblr nearly every day (I mean not just reblogging). If you ever wonder why I don't post, you know what I'm doing instead: building dreams that I can live in and live for and work on until I die. Okay. A lot of the time I'm just watching some show or listening to a podcast. It does all add up though. Anyway, I'm becoming who I want to be.
One last thing: I feel silly and conceited for saying this, but I feel like I am who I want to be just by trying. I feel important because I want to be. I feel special because I imagine myself being special someday.
Until the next post, and as always, take care. :)