Friday, July 17, 2009

Reasons Why I'm Strange and an Unfun Ending

This picture is about a year old. I need to look at something cute and innocuous. Read the end and you will know why.
Okay, I know I'm not normal. I'm often given a look that I call Dork Recognition because I lack an adequate description. Why do I get this look? Well, given it's frequent appearance, I have to say it is because I'm just strange. I'll share a few specific reasons for fellow dorks to compare with.

Reasons Why People Think I'm Strange

1. I like to clean and organize.

If it can be organized, I want to organize it. If there is a pile of dishes, I want them to be clean. If a room is a complete mess, I probably want to clean it. I don't think people should think I'm strange because of this. I think they should thank me (optional: in the form of monetary payment) to do what I will do anyway if I'm left unattended for a few hours.

2. I am indecisive.

You don't want to test this one. The most painful thing anyone can do is ask me to make a decision. Tuna or Beef? Red button or button that just has "red" printed on it? This one or this one? AH! It hurts! I really do get strange looks because of this. I'm really bad with produce, especially apples. I have plenty of stories, but if I elaborate on this one any longer, I will get a headache.

3. I don't get bored easily.
It's no secret. I have hobbies. If you don't, you are probably one of those people who gets on my nerves because you constantly say "I'm bored". Why should I care? I can't entertain you. You probably don't want to see me try. I'll probably say something awkward and, instead of boredom, you will be plagued with being disturbed.

4. I would rather stay home than go outside, most of the time.
I can entertain myself, therefore I need not go outside. Enough said.

5. My hobbies
I like to do a lot of things and some of them don't seem normal to other people. The most frequently mentioned strange hobby is knitting. People don't know what to do, so they gawk, gape, talk about their grandma, touch the thing I'm knitting and feel the urge to touch me after (I'm somewhat disturbed by this one because I don't like being touched)

6. My thoughts and conversation skills
I think this one is best explained by an explanation inspired by a real conversation I had with someone. This is a rough, much shorter retelling.
Friend: So, what are you thinking about?
Me (staring at a tree): How I've always thought of 9 as an even number because 3 goes into it evenly 3 times.
Friend: O.o What the . . . ? *long, awkward pause followed by an awkward laugh* Nine is not an even number.
Me: I know. It's odd. I've just always thought about it that way.
Friend: O.o

This example is only accurate if I'm comfortable talking to the person. If I'm not, my mind goes completely blank and I come up with something more like this fake conversation:
Person: What are you thinking about?
Me (caught off-guard, so staring at a wall): That is a really white wall. It reminds me of an insane asylum.
Person: That's a normal wall color.
Me: It's still really white.
Person: So you were thinking about the color of the wall?
Me: This cracker doesn't taste like a cracker . . .
And so on and so forth . . .

Most of the time, my thoughts randomly come out because I'm very awkward in conversations. I mention the most bizarre things and tell often irrelevant stories. The problem is when I stay quiet, people look at me like I'm some sort of freak anyway. *sigh* I really do try.

Not really the end, but the reasons end here.
Everyone is strange in some way and gets looks for it. If anyone cares to share how they're strange, you have my attention. Okay, so you can actually say anything to get my attention. That's another topic . . .

Yikes. Claire just found a giant spider and it disappeared. :S I have to end on this lovely note because I need to give her some moral support in the form of quivering and holding a broom.

Until the next post, and as always, take care, embrace your inner dork, and be scary spider-free!

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